softly selfish

i pretend
just in this moment suspended
that everything is fine.

curpusculars, warm winds,
and Ivory
of piano keys

make me believe
that every child's tum
is a full,
and round
as mine.

that the sirens of hospitals across the way
have ceased
not just for now
for how long this moment lasts

and delusion
is that it will last forever,

for forever is moment-- it exsits only in our mind,
as does this beauty,
a capturing of rays spilled from a slowly dimming star
as does these words echoing out chapped lips,
only gargled noise,
reverberations whisper to you who are far,
"I love you," as though you are near

as i believe
in my figment
in my mind
in my heart.

I will take a selfish moment
to believe that all is well.

that parents do not scream,
for sound is too soft here, in this moment
that men do not die hungry,
for it is to robust here.

but pretending fades as notes flicker out,
snuffed as delicate smoke

and moments
fade gray.

still,
clouds gleam and babes breathe.
still,
silence washes ovr'this place,
my bosom;
my heart;
my soul, if that is the phrase we wish to use.

I must keep selfish moments like these with me for times
when there is no time
for selfish moments,
no time
for hearts to be free.

i shall put it in my pocket,
as the little diddy goes,
and save it for a gloomy day.


oh, LORD,

be with me,

always.